Ivana Tripabitch... 

Today we went and saw the Lowcountry High Rollers in the Spring Equi-knocks! They're the new area roller derby team, and tonight was their home opener at the local Shriner's Hall. Life doesn't get any better than this, ladies and gentlemen.

After watching the match, I can say with some certainty that I will never ever be a roller derby diva. They're definitely an impressively physical bunch. I don't even like for doctors to touch me...let alone a 400 lb "woman" named "Ballistic Bambi" (or some such clever name). I'm pretty sure that after one sound fall on my tookus, that my coccyx would split in two and I'd spend the rest of my young adulthood in a protective ass cast.

However, should I ever find myself wanting for the attention of roller derby fans...I would begrudgingly don the helmet and take my place as, "Fragile! Kerry this side up." Fanatical fans could just call me "Fragile."


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